Miscellaneous Jokes
Adult Joke:Sex and travel
I guy walks up to a really pretty girl at the bar and says, “Hey, babe can I buy you a
drink?”
She says, "Do you like sex?"
The guy says, “Sure! Of course, I like sex.”
Them she asks, “Do you like to travel?”
The guy replies, “Yeah, I love to travel.”
“Well” she says, “Then fuck off some where else.”
Long Joke:feeling sick
A guy goes to his doctor and says, “Doc, I really feel ill, can you do some tests?”
“Sure” says the Doc, “I'll call you when the results come back”
The guy thanks the Doc and then goes about his daily routine.
Two days later the phone wakes the guy up. He picks it up and it’s the Doc.
The doctor says, “I've got some good news and some bad news.”
The guy says, "What is the good news?”
“You have 24 hours to live.”
“And what's the bad news?” asks the guy.
“Sorry” says the Doc, “But I forgot to call you yesterday.”
Hilarious Joke:Bakers Job
A baker's job is a piece of cake. Of course if it's a special job he will rise to the
occasion. It's the yeast he can do. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
But they stop making donuts when they get tired of the hole thing. In a bakery, buns
usually play a small roll. But tell a baker his dough has fallen, and you'll get a rise out of
him. To find out how the business is doing, look at the pie chart. Old bakers never die.
They just keep on making more dough.
Funny Joke: Ice-cream
A guy walks past an ice cream stand that advertises, “Every ice cream flavour in the
world.”
“Yea right,” thinks the guy and walks in. “So you say you have every flavour of ice cream
in the world?”
“That’s right,” says the assistant.
“O.K. Then, I’ll have three scoops of pussy flavoured ice cream, please.”
“No problem, sir.” As he puts three scoops in a cone and hands it to the guy.
The guy takes a good long lick then grimaces. “Hey, this doesn't taste like pussy, it
tastes like shit!”
The assistant replies, "Of course it tastes like shit, you need to take shorter licks!
I guy walks up to a really pretty girl at the bar and says, “Hey, babe can I buy you a
drink?”
She says, "Do you like sex?"
The guy says, “Sure! Of course, I like sex.”
Them she asks, “Do you like to travel?”
The guy replies, “Yeah, I love to travel.”
“Well” she says, “Then fuck off some where else.”
Long Joke:feeling sick
A guy goes to his doctor and says, “Doc, I really feel ill, can you do some tests?”
“Sure” says the Doc, “I'll call you when the results come back”
The guy thanks the Doc and then goes about his daily routine.
Two days later the phone wakes the guy up. He picks it up and it’s the Doc.
The doctor says, “I've got some good news and some bad news.”
The guy says, "What is the good news?”
“You have 24 hours to live.”
“And what's the bad news?” asks the guy.
“Sorry” says the Doc, “But I forgot to call you yesterday.”
Hilarious Joke:Bakers Job
A baker's job is a piece of cake. Of course if it's a special job he will rise to the
occasion. It's the yeast he can do. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.
But they stop making donuts when they get tired of the hole thing. In a bakery, buns
usually play a small roll. But tell a baker his dough has fallen, and you'll get a rise out of
him. To find out how the business is doing, look at the pie chart. Old bakers never die.
They just keep on making more dough.
Funny Joke: Ice-cream
A guy walks past an ice cream stand that advertises, “Every ice cream flavour in the
world.”
“Yea right,” thinks the guy and walks in. “So you say you have every flavour of ice cream
in the world?”
“That’s right,” says the assistant.
“O.K. Then, I’ll have three scoops of pussy flavoured ice cream, please.”
“No problem, sir.” As he puts three scoops in a cone and hands it to the guy.
The guy takes a good long lick then grimaces. “Hey, this doesn't taste like pussy, it
tastes like shit!”
The assistant replies, "Of course it tastes like shit, you need to take shorter licks!